IRC addicts ยป
You might be addicted to irc if...
Top 10 signs you may be addicted to IRC.
10. Your service provider calls *you* for tech support.
9. Someone at work tells you a joke, and you say "LOL!"
8. You have ever had a dream about the people in your channels.
7. You have to scroll through your popup menu.
6. You watch T.V. with closed captioning turned on.
5. Your friend Tom tells you something sad on the phone and you say "Awwww, me hugs Tom."
4. You've called out someone else's nick while making love to your husband.
3. You keep begging your friend's to get an internet account so "we can hang out."
2. Three words: carpal tunnel syndrome.
1. You laughed at this list.
_____________________________________________________
You might be addicted to irc if....
...your friends are now convinced that IRC stands for "I Repeat Classes."
...you want to meet a girl and your first impulse is to turn on your computer.
...you once devoted a weekend to "working on your popups."
...you sometimes go to #egypt "just to get away from it all."
...when you join #callahans everyone types "Norm!"
...you're a heterosexual male, but one time you used a feminine nick "just to mess with the horny net geeks."
...you come home from class, look at your roomates, and say "ib."
...you wait for your roomates to say "re."
...the words "takeover," "nick collide," and "flood" make your heart beat faster and your hands a little shakey.
...sometimes you type commands from the unix prompt you mistakenly begin them with a "/"
...you've ever gotten onto an airplane just to meet some folks face to face.
...you make it a point to change your ping reply and quit message daily.
...you have over 2 megs of .wav files on your mirc directory.
...you have to get a second phone line just so you can call Domino's.
...your child ignores your request and you wonder if she is lagged.
...you send internet Christmas cards. *wink*
...you've ever felt the urge to type "*wink*."
...you have ever wondered if there is a #irc-anon.
...you have an irc web page.
...you've ever went to one of those form-submit web page 'chats' just to say
"you loosers don't even know what irc is,
do you? Huh!? DO YOU!?!"
...you've ever logged on to dalnet.
...you join #hispanola "just to work on my Spanish."
...when someone on the channel asks if anyone knows some good servers, everyone else types your nick.
...you join busy channels just to talk to yourself because the scrolling makes you feel better about it somehow.
...you've ever typed "drinking on irc is better than drinking alone."
...you go into labor and you stop to type a "special" away message.
...you have a vanity car tag with your nick on it.
_____________________________________________________
[irc.gif] Oh, so YOU have something funny to add now, huh?
From Karma:
...you've been lagged so bad that you've switched servers so much you can see you nick on the channel list 3 times.
From Lori:
...you no longer type with proper punctuation, capitolization, or complete senteces..
From Charlotte (Vilas):
* you live on #twilight_zone for months praying for an O: line
* you end up with 7 O: lines
* to get revenge on someone you know in RL, you mail bomb them..through the
US postal service, that is
* you have met over 100 ircers
* you /umode +s because you dont feel right without it
* you dont know your boyfriend/girlfriend's first name
* your boyfriend/girlfriend in RL gets on IRC coz its the only way to reach
you
* you know which servers are major hubs..in *.tw
* you call your S.O (boyfriend/girlfriend is too long to type) a HNG
* you use words like 'leet' and 'lame' in RL
* you find yourself wishing that that bitch on your hall were on irc so you
could flood her
* you read operlist
* you tell your rfiends you have plans already on saturday night when you dont
* your .ircrc is over 80k
* you feel a need to talk in all caps to certain people in RL
* your desk is the only part of your room you ever use (screw the bed ;)
* you have ever put a smiley in a paper for school
From homie@cyberhighway.net:
the JehovA's Witnesses knock on the door, and all you can think of doing is flood them with PINGs.
You get a call from a telemarketer, and instead of hanging up on them, you set down the phone, and set their mode to -v
You call up your friend Nick, and /invite $nick to #watch_TV
You offer the babysitter OPS when you go out for the night
You refer to rush hour traffic as LAGGED... or to avoid traffic, you tell your
passenger you need to quit for a second
to switch servers
The word I is now replaced in your vocabulary with /me.
You raise your hand in class, and say "BRB"
You have more than 3 private MSG windows going simultaneously
You won't subscribe to a certain internet provider because they don't offer unlimited time per month
Instead of taking a disk home from work, you set up your BOT to serve it to you later that night
You no longer have to stop and explain to your friends what "RE ALL" means
You begin to say hehehehehehehehe instead of laughing
You don't sleep at night because you are too stay up late thinking of a new NICK
You know and use regularly, more than 10 different ways to smile in ascii text
From William Estep (wbestep@whidbey.net):
...You cry when you see more than 3 quit messages with two servers listed as the reason.
From Babieface (aka. Karen)
..when someone says "what did you say?" you reply "scroll up!"
..you find yourself sneaking away to the computer in the middle of the might
when your spouse is asleep to get more irc
time in!
..you turn down the lights and close the blinds so people won't know that you are on irc again!
..you know more about your irc "friends" daily routines than you do your own spouses!
..when someone in a channel says "where is today, and you know exactly
where that person is and why they are not logged
on.
..you find yourself lieing to others about your irc time. When they complain
your phone is busy, you claim it was off
the hook!
..you have an identity crisis if someone else is using your nick.
..you would rather tell people your bloodshot eyes are from partying too much
instead of the truth (up all night on
irc!)
..you change nicks so much that you have to type /me to see who you are!
..you put on special mood music while talking to certain people in private chats!
..your friends on irc were above your RL friends on your Christmas card list!
..you find yourself involved in channel politics on irc!
..you ever turned down real hugs for {{hugs}} from your irc friends.
..you have actually kept up with 10 converstions at one time! <---this one
shows either great skill or that you are too
far gone!
..you postpone your college graduation date so you can keep your free .edu account!
From Eponine:
..you have ever written a pen-and-paper letter to someone and found it _impossible_ to do without smilies
From Rampie:
...you don't even bother answering the phone anymore...
... If you're broke and your modem burns out and you go out on to the streeets to sell your body to get a new one..
...If you are willing to risk a divorce because your husband doesn't like all the time you are spending on the computer
...If you are willing to sell a kidney to get to the next #anne-Rice channel meet
...If you are risking your job by staying on #anne-rice in the afternoon
From Antha:
...If you open up your home to 15 strangers for a week merely because they have computers and cute nicknames
... if you consider getting an THIRD phone line so your S.O. can get online on a diff acct
...If you yell at ppl cause they aww using more than 2 w's and are messing up your URL list
...if your kids are standing at your side going "mommy, please come cook dinner" and you'd rather type another "LOL!"
From Gabrielle:
...If the first thing you say after coming out of a movie is, "Hey. Remember
that funny line? It would make a perfect
info line!"
From: Scullycj
...you Marry your cyberboyfriend RT and you both sit at your own computers
and chat to each other every night from
across the room! (Hehehe I did...do this:)
From: Lonny
...you have ever had netsex with a bot.
From:Stephen/meridian
your first thought when your nick is taken is "VERSION"
From:Scruples
You might be addicted to irc if...both you and your wife has thier own computer, server, and e-mail address.
From:brannigan
You might be addicted to irc if...you download this list to send it to your other net friends.
From: Firestrtr (url only)
From:Pilgrim
You might be addicted to irc if...you keep making channels with one more "!",
just so you can get the top of the
channel list
From:Agent X
You might be addicted to irc if...
... you have to go on Irc by sneaking on your friend/Father's Laptop while they
are at work or are away.
...you are a X files fan and go on #X-files just to say "Does anyone here like the X-Files T.V.Show?"
...you go on but can continue after your computer searches for your server you yell "Dumb, Server".
..... you constantly say "hello?" or "you lagged, boy" to anyone on the street.
From: Bouncey (Charles Terrell)
You might be addicted to irc if...Your S.O.'s friends and family (all in the
same geographical area, most computer
illiterate, none addicted to IRC) refer to you by your nick, because for months
that's the only name they heard.
From:Q-bert_2
... You came here when the channel you were on was less than 20 people
From:duck
...if you find it RIGHT..........right
From:Scruples
You might be addicted to irc if...both you and your wife has thier own computer, server, and e-mail address.
From:brannigan
You might be addicted to irc if...you download this list to send it to your other net friends.
From:DWildstar (That's Mr. Wildstar to you Europeans)
* you use the words "donut" or "broked" in email
* you type in all lowercase now, even while typing assignments
* you keep an irc window open while doing homework
* you use irc as an excuse for procrastinating on homework
* you've gone through more than one keyboard because you can't leave irc long enough to have a cig
* you type messages to people while you're talking to them on the phone
* you hack your server idle time "so lamers donut bug me"
* you've ever actually used "donut" or "woii" in a sentance
* your nick is mentioned on an irc web page (or worse...it's published in printed material somewhere)
* you keep a client on 24/7 so someone doesn't steal your nick
From:Sommer
you *do* preface things in email with /me
you feel the urge to /kick and /ban annoying peopel in person
From: ?
... you argue with your kids over whose turn it is.
...when you write a letter you put :-) at the end of a sentence
From:larrrrry
...You wont work at a job that doesnt have a modem involed
From:robs
...you sign your nick instead of your "real name"
From:Odeon
...you take your girlfriend on a date to #redlobster, then to a movie at #cineplex_odeon.
From:GOLDORAK
...you want to kick-ban your sister from your house.
From: itsmeKaren
...you hang out in the #florida room on dalnet and are involved in the soap opera that goes on there
From:Sakashca
...you look at your cat and say mmmm chicken
From:JEEPjr
...you sat around for more than 2 minutes trying to think of a witty "You
might be addicted to irc if..." joke to add
to this list.
From:Crazed
Your husband announces that he is getting a second line..no matter what you
say!! He's tired of the phone always being
busy.
From: Eric Hauser/Trekkie
...refuse to go to alt.irc.recovery when your friends tell you too...
...your dog leaves you...
...you have to ask what the year is...
...build a toilet into your computer chair so you never *miss* anything...
From: ripclaw
... You join certain channels just to read the funny topics
From:Zilch
...If your sitting sitting at work with NO IRC Clients and you can't find any;
Anywhere, You get sidetracked into
reading webs about IRC.
From: DaPackFan
...you have to replace your / and # keys every few weeks.
From:cr0w
You might be addicted to irc if you are telling someone about all your friends and it turns out they are all on IRC...
From:Libby
You might be addicted to irc if..are doing things more and more that you swore
you would never, ever do when you first
found chat!
From:Stephie url only
From:[A-Jax]
... if you write a letter like this "dear tom, lo! how r u doin well i gotta go bbl!"
From:karen ballard
You might be addicted to irc if you stay on here until your eyes are bloodshot
From:PuppyDog
...you enter a channel and the bots say hi!
From:Kupan
...you suggest to your company to hold its meetings on IRC so "The boss can put +m on"
...you name your pets after people you talk to on IRC.
...you ever tell a story in RL of something funny that happened on IRC to people that have no idea what it is.
From:VEGGIE
You are reading this.....
From:Matt (MattRB@northshore.net) is obese fatty
You might be addicted to irc if you masterbate to the irc chats
From:BornNaked
...you smile sideways
From: MMiller
Whenever you log on to a server you immediately get 10 messages from people who have you on thier notify list
You can handle 10 messages
You can't even remember the names to all the channels you have ops on
Your internet provider disconnects you for using an *unlimited* account too much
After the above happening you seriously consider a dedicated account
you have a map on the wall with red thumbtacks to mark where people are
You have to take an vacation from IRC because you can not keep up with the messages anymore
You have IRC in the background with the word AWAY after your nick while viewing this page
People /msg you even when your nick has AWAY in it
People have your AWAY nick in thier notify list
Your spent more than $300 on long distance calling those you met on IRC
Whenever a netsplit or mode change occurs and someone asks what happened everyone in the channel says to ask you
You got tired of answering what happened and have made popups to describe netsplits and mode changes
You have 5 copies of an IRC client installed on your hard disk to be on more than one net at a time
Your might miss *important* action in a channel while submitting this
You actually submitted this
From:rebelyell
... have opened a # called #IRCanonymous - topic 12 steppers fer irc addicts ..."meets here"
From:jillo
...you look at an annoying friend and wish you could type /ignore
From:DrilGrrl
...you can carry on a conversation with the bot(s)
From:jessie
...a woman make me come on the net
From:bRain_surgeon
you type zandzeepsodemineraalwatersteenstralen in 1 time !
From:Steve's girlfriend
...you actually are reading these corny things!!!!
From Antha:
"You know you're addicted to irc when you find stupid reasons to log into
yourshell account, knowing full well you can
type "irc" from there and be there in 2 seconds"
From:Norahs
...you drink less water cuz u don't wanna go to the washroom during your chat.
...you wrote your nick as your name in RL
From: ?
...you ask Electronics Boutique what warez they have.
...you flood your enemies by talking fast.
From:Spookje
You might be addicted to irc if.Your chatmates know you better then your own mummie :)..
From:Dozer
...Your time on-line is measured with a Calender.
...You use your lunchbreak to jump back on to look for memo's
...You get pulled over by the police, and they inform you that you were reported missing 2 months ago.
...You bring a sack lunch and cooler to the terminal.
From:hdoan0 (url only)
From: ?
You actually know everybody in your irc channel.
From:case
... Your SO kisses your neck while you type and you think "uh oh DCC Chat request"
... Your wife starts mabbling at you on the bed and you try to find the /Ignore all command
... You get an instant turn on with the phrase "5'11 tall long blond hair blue eyes"
... The keys of your keyboard are refusing to work properly after few months
and you end up writing something like "
I'm professionl relly!"
From: Yossef
...you've ever submitted something here.
...you've ever used the term "RL".
...you find it necessary to differentiate between RL (real life, in case you
don't know) and IRC_life to keep track of
everything. (You're worse off if you don't do this, though.)
From:Judie/Hbilli
You might be addicted to irc if...the only time you log off irc is to travel to work where you immediately log back on.
...you go into irc withdrawals if you are away from a computer for more than a few hours.
From:LedHed
You make up reasons to ur wife to stay late at the office so u can take advantage of their service link.
From:dilly (url only)
From:Jophiel
You might be addicted to irc if..
. You only think of your TAB key as that "private message key"
From:cassiopeia
...you risk possible suspension and or expulsion from high school to download
a copy of mIRC onto the computer in the
library so you can IRC from Study Hall
From:dagger@goodnet.com
...your "first time" began with the command "/me..." -or-
...you've got a registered channel beginning with your nick!
From:JLPicard
You might be addicted to irc if... ...someone offers you lady fingers at a
party and you have an urge to do a /WHOIS on
them.
From:daisy
...you post additions to this page.
From: Dan
...You're a regular op in channel #mirc or #mirchelp (which I am, heheh)
From:tj-
...u added this link to your homepage :)
...u use IRC lingo in everyday life(if u still have one)hehe
From:Kin
...Your GPA is inversely proportional to the time spent on IRC
From Patrick
You might be addicted to irc if you are from the island of Malta
From: Leonardo
...when writing someone a letter you feel inclined to make your smileys SIDEWAYS
From:Manu
...you e-mail prospective employers and leave a channel name they can find you at
...you handcuff yourself to your chair when you join #submission (not that I've ever done that!)
...you set up the PC to answer the phone and turn on IRC automatically when it rings
From: ?
...Grandma reminds you about an upcoming family reunion and you tell her she can borrow your server.
From:Labtek
From:Jophiel
You start making appointments to meet IRC people that have more importance than your real life appointments.
You leave yourself setaway for longer than a half hour because it's easier than trying to dial in
From: Alexious
your friend tells you a joke and you say "ROTFL..."
your friend doesn't answer you and you wonder how to PING him.
From:Sept
...you know not only the best servers to access, but also the best ports.
From:FoxMoleder
...you never get round to using the internet and spend your time on mirc.
From:thedab@ix.netcom.com
...you think you need more memory, but forgot why....
...you take a speed reading course to keep up with the scrolling...
...you start thinking 100 megahertz is to slow...
From:Apollo-
...your notify list ha over a hundred people on it
...your worst comeback to a bully is "I'll slap you with a large trout"
From:John Hubbard
You might be addicted to irc if you refer to sick ppl as lagged
You might be addicted to irc if you tell your fellow workers/studenrts to call you by your IRC nick
You might be addicted to irc if you have over 2 megs of bots
From : Anonymous
... When you were born, the first thing you did , is type /server ...
From: TonyGirl
You might be addicted to irc if...you say that you're hiding under a chair, and then actually go and do it.
From:Sub-Zer0
...You set yourself /away while burning dinner
From:hunney
...you suddenly realize you are late for work.....cause you were on irc all night.........
From: QFinger
...you read every single line of this page.
From:joybutton
...you know more than 7 of the people in a channel at any given time.
...you have an overwhelming urge to say "burb" when you leave your friends for a few minutes.
...you own a bumper-sticker that says "Split Happens."
From:milkshake
...you have cyber dates with people that you have never met before
From:Spicy1
...when you wake up in the morning the first thing you do is get on to IRC before you have your coffee.
From: ?
You might be addicted to irc if...cant rememeber anything in the day prior to getting on the pc
From:sewlynne@gnn.com
...You are using the irc to conduct settlement conferences about your upcoming divorce.
From:Keroppi
...you call your airline to buy a roundtrip ticket to #france.
From:Charlotte Hanks (Vilas)
You might be addicted to irc if...
You have posted to this page more then once
You keep on clicking over to your 4 irc windows while you do it..
(well, maybe someone msged me!)
You buy more RAM so you can have more sessions open
You know over 5 people who have posted to this page
You're a regular on over 10 channels
You've ever broken up with a S.O over IRC
You've ever said "Mom, can I come live at your place for a bit? I cant
deal with school..not enough time online.."
You have driven over 5 hours to meet an ircer
You've compiled ircd on your linux box just for the hell of it
You know what the correct format for a Y: line is
You know what jupe.c does
You read operlist
You have /alias lamer msg $0 wow, R U M OR F is a great way to meet people!
You know irc scripting
You can come up with about 500 of these damn things
Your boyfriend knows when new servers get linked
Your grandmother knows what a clonebot is
Your professors all know what sendQ's are
You know what sendQ's are
From:bongibo
you get rid of your cybercafe in france to go and live in canada with mylene....
From:BassPlay
You might be addicted to irc if...U go 2 a party, meet agirl, and ask her how she look.
From: Saint skullY the Dazed
You might be addicted to irc if you have the urge to kick people in real life.
From: Hugger
... Your family opens an internet coffeehouse and you get bummed 'cause most
servers won't authorize you, so you keep
your account at another server and dial in at 28.8 instead of using the 56k
connection just 'cause U miss access to
your fave server
From:_Crono95
... you include your nick in your e-mail signature
From:HW.
You are in a liberal arts College, but all of your friends understand *lol*, brb, re, kewl, etc!
You and your boyfriend/girlfriend broke up because he/she wouldn't let you
get on-line when you spent winterbreak at
his/her house.
From:Pharao
...u enter a room and you say /me greets all
You might be addicted to irc if...
more addicts I.R.C. links Additions
You may REALLY be addicted to irc if...
From:luckycat
You might be addicted to irc if...
... You wonder what that strange light is that comes in the room where your
computer is at 6 A.M.
... You often have to use the More Windows selection on your IRC client's menu bar.
... You use numbers 4 communication 2 to some1 else.
From kittie@ismi.net
You might be addicted to IRC if you read this list, while on IRC, after making
an IRC homepage.
From:frog
You might be addicted to irc if...
...you know who danlectro is !!!
From:Sharkbiter@earthlink.net
You might be addicted to irc if...You have to inject no-doze into your butt
to keep it awake ...
From:smuddie
You might be addicted to irc if...when you type reports on your puter you get
a bad grade cause its full of :) and :?
From:jEF
You might be addicted to irc if...
...mIRC is in your Windows startup folder
From: _tYe_
You might be addicted to irc if...
... you wait 6 hours online for a certain "special" person to come
home from work.
... you meet the "special" cyberboyfriend/girlfriend and wish they were as good looking as the did on the irc.
... you start hanging around only the nicks that sound "hot"
... you fear the people that actually spend more time on the irc than you.
... you don't know where the time has gone.
... you start ordering out for "cyber pizza".
... your blatter threatens to "EXPLODE".
From: plett on #teenclub
You might be addicted to irc if...
you search round the web looking for more "You might be addicted to irc
if" pages
From: Doh-Boy
You might be addicted to IRC if ...
you end sentences with 3 periods while writing letters in pen/pencil.
From: MNx
You might be addicted to irc if...
... You have placed mIRC in your startup group in Windows
From:tarka
You might be addicted to irc if...
...you have to 'sell' your body just to pay your telephone bill
From:amicus
You might be addicted to irc if...
You dream that a cop stops you for speeding but can't give you a ticket cuz
you are a chanop and he isn't.
You get your own domain name so you can run a mailing list for the people on your channel
You get upset when someone opens a channel similar to yours and the the # of people that usually show up drops by half
From:Arch-aic
You might be addicted to irc if...
you plan writing a novel to show how addictive IRC-ing is and you start IRC-ing
to get first hand material
From:Dinky
You might be addicted to irc if your isp's router blocks port 6666 through 6668
From:Chloe
You might be addicted to irc if...you are getting sick and tired of watching
3000 elephants gracefully chewing
bubblegum
From:tony :)
You might be addicted to irc if...
you are an adict to men
From: Avermaas
You might be addicted to irc if...
... You get screwed
From:
You might be addicted to irc if...
...You read all of the above.
From:CrtJester
You might be addicted to irc if...your relashenship on IRC has gone ferther
than any real one..
From:WeatherMan
You might be addicted to irc if...
...when you get the message "unable to resolve server" and you start
to cry
From:texasteddybear
You might be addicted to irc if...get up at 2:00 am to go bathroom, but go turn
on your pc
From:Janny
...you want to get intimate with your wife and you look for the instant message
icon
From: Rev. Krusty
. ... you use terms like krad and lag in real life.
From:|Ren| and TOOLS
...you start telling your RL friends to call you by your IRC nick
From:bigbird
...when u get on line ppl tell someone had your nick but they told them to change to something else
From:catkins
...more than half the people you have slept with you met on irc (though that isn't true in my case obviously)
From:Ginger&Cinnamon
... you find out that your best friend is a virtual one
You start to listen to SOUND ...wav instead of radio
Lie to everybody that you are horny, sexy and cool only to get a "boyfriend"
From:_Smeghead
..u can't write a snail mail to u'r grandparents without including at least one acronym and a smiley :)
From:Urza
. ...you ever sign official documents using your IRC nick
From:chiaavon
...your wife divorces you because you send dirty messeges to yourself
From: aimee
... you suffer relapse when you haven't been on for awhile.
From:scrawfrd@peterboro.net
...your pulse starts racing.. when you hear the sound of your interact card..processing... at the supermarket..
From:porcelina
. ...you spell things out loud instead of actually saying the word...
you write a letter to someone in RL and use things like: lol, hehe, and brb.
.. you've talked to the person for 3 months on irc, actally met in RL once and decide that 'she's the one for you'
... you dont even notice anymore when someone has made a typo
... when you enter a channel and 50 ppl greet you with {{{{ hugs }}} or ***
missed you !! *** you stop typing the whole
word and use things like ppl, dunno and lemme.
.. you log on to irc to see the rest of your family who now live across the country
... your friends on irc know you better than your friends in RL
... you put ** around the words you want to emphisize like: where were *YOU* yesterday??
... you come up with more than one or t! wo of these silly things...
From: Cyberdeath
. ... When you take a break and shut off your modem, you get a call from your
mother whose been trying to reach you for
seven years
From:LadyLuck
...Your children begin to call you by your NICK.
You sign your NICK on important papers instead of your real name.
You are seriously considering legally changing your name to your NICK.
Your children can "chat" before they can walk or talk!
You give your child a nick in addition to a name.
From:Tima
. ...your answering machine message is "BRB, leave your username and channel, and I will TTYL"
From: PepTalk, `2TrnTblz
.. you've gotten points marked off on a test for using ppl instead of people.
From:PF
.. ..you have a bot answering all your away messages
. ..you never actually had a chance to read this list because you where constantly
beeing called by your irc buddies
during a multitasking session
..you spend hours a day on the net and still don't know what a webpage is.
You never got round to visiting the rest of
the net.
..you have to get a second job to pay your telephone bill
. ..you only pick those jobs whome have an internet connection
. ..you descide to organize an irc-meeting in a cybercafe so everybody can still IRC to each other.
..you have been to atleast three cyberweddings in the last six months or less
. ..you went to #hawaii on your first cyber honymoon
. ..bought a laptop with pci modem and portable phone just to keep in touch 24 hours a day with your irc buddies
..the last and only film you saw in the last 2.3 years was "The Net", you downloaded the mpeg version
. ..you haven't experienced a real life situation in the last 5 months
. ..wonder if real 3d humans of flesh and blood really exist or is just an old myth from the days before IRC.
..you have begged for an op
. ..you willingly had virtual sex for an op
. ..you keep a file on every person you met on irc just in case you where to
meet him or her again several months from
now
. ..if you used to live a dubble life, (one irl & one on irc) but finaly
managed to get rid of your rl because it got
to complicated.
..you finaly have come to terms that you actually don't have a life anymore
. ..you think you are bot.
..you type faster then you can think
. ..you got your psychiatrist addicted on irc too and are now undergoing therapy
in a private channel instead of in his
practiosion
. ..you always get an invitation for invite-only channels
submit your url here but not on which channels you normaly hang out
. ..you measure the time it takes the ball to get back to the winning player during a ping pong match
. ..you think irc has cured your shyness
. ..you believe that a "byte" can hurt a "bit"
..your irc program IS your screensaver
. ..you don't have a family album but you did have a special cd made with all
your favourite logs from past irc
sessions
. ..you have ever tried to convince someone on the other side of the world that it was lunch time
. ..you want to be burried with your computer when it dies.. or vica versa
... ..you actually enjoy the fact that you are addicted. ..you have been exposed
to irc for atleast an hour in y! our
life.
..you know friends whome have died of an overdosis of irc.
..you can actually read and follow all the names of the cast that scrolls up your tv-screen at the end of a movie.
..you can even read the hidden coca cola messages that apear once in every twenty-four frames of the same movie.
..have the urg to reply every time you read the readers column in a magazine
or newspaper. Oops, this is more for the
newsgroup addicts :)
..if i say PING, you say "...." (..hehe, this part was interactive) ;)
..if it wheren't for your super reflexes in your eyes and fingers, you would have long been classified as a vegetable.
..you dream in messages.
..you notice your flooding this website with even more symptoms of addiction.
..being called a newbie is a major insult. ..your gravestone will have a quit message instead of a rip.
..brb
From:Bluegal
. ...you run a water line to the Mr. Coffee next to your desk so you don't have to "/away" to run coffee.
...you find out your IRC client can run two instances at the same time, and you get chills. :)
From:shann junkin/ satans daughter
...you give your new born baby a handle...
From:
...you say "bbl" after finishing a conversation with someone
From:Hobbes
..there is absolutely no intresting conversation in any channels and you are
really bored...yet you dont want to leave
in case you "miss something" ...
From:Krisp
. ...put :) or ;) all over your web pages.
From:Darn
...your worried about getting fat from too many e-pizzas.
From:
. ...Whenever you write ANYTHING funny, you just HAVE to make a little smiley:)
...ruined your married and you are leaving you wife a daughter.
From:
. ...if you typed in your own addiction
From eddyjo
.you double click your tv remote..
From: good-girl
..You can't get on an irc server and you search the internet for a server that
will let you on instead of doing your
homework ...
From EspReSso
...You proposed to your spouse on IRC
. ...Your wife went into labor while doing IRC
. ...Your now 6 month old kid has his own computer, web-page & has actually
been on IRC himself =)
[http://www.rotfl.com/lilbean] =)
...Family time is spent Online
. ...You change your legal real name to your IRC nick (Not that i'm in the process of this or anything =b)
...You just typed "=b"
. ...Everyone you know hangs out in a channel with Your Nick
. ...You've DCC'd you picture to so many people you later found it in News Groups (and "nude" was in the name).
...You own your own ISP just so you can get to IRC easier
. ....it's domain has ROTFL in it ;) (http://www.rotfl.com/)
...Almost all your users hang in your channel.
...You know Antha
. ...You are saving for yet an! ot!her IRC meeting trip
. ...You spent 3 months traveling and living off people you met Online (i've done this).
...You just read the above and thought it was a good idea.
From:EspReSso
..You spent so long reading this you idle timed out of IRC.
...after getting back on IRC you revisited to add this.
From:EspReSso
..You stay in school for the free PPP.
...You want your wife to move into the dorms to have free Ether
. ...You have had over 5 providers due to k-lines
. ...You know what a k-line is.
...There is over 10 servers with a k-line just for You
. ...You have gotten into a RL fight with on Op.
...You remember when EfNet started.
...You have more then one post to this page.
...You can now type over 70 wpm.
...You just now find out eggdrop is a Soup.
.....you found out by that last line.
From: WeThree - #bartender
...You threaten to 'kick someones ass off and ban them' in real life
From:
. ...you like to have sex with bastards and then reveil you a guy, i do that sometimes, good for a laugh
From:Fred_Fish
...your 1 true luv doesnt even kno ur name
From:Abique
. ...you and your brother almost wreck your cars trying to get home to the computer first....
.....you think how to spell words when you carry on a person to person conversation...
....you think about starting a 12 step recovery group for net junkies...
From:ko-ko
...If u are on the phone for a minute and u need to do something else u say "brb" or "bbl"
From:Application
. ...You hit people in the head with balls and count the time It takes for the balls to return.
From:Sparky
..You Go Into The Stupid Thing And Actually USE It ...
From: No_WayMan
. ... If you are bored and start up another client just to have someone to talk to
From:Tammarra
...you check your email and forget you have real mail in your mail box aka snail mail.
From:Aaron/Freejack
...or your friend might be addicted if you can never get on your own computer to play a normal computer game !!!!!
From:Heff
...You start School one day and wish you could just /ignore everyone ...
From:Akira
. ...you have your age and sex on a macro
From: MV
...you think that the next season of MTVs the Real World should be Real World: IRC
From:
...you go into withdrawls during dinner...
From:Johnpaul
. ... you say to an annoying kid in class, dont be a leech on my f-server, or I'll kick/ban you.
you raise your hand and say"OP ME!"
you say to someone annoying, next time you will get a 15 minute ban.
When many people are speaking you say "hey, no flooding!"
When someone doesn't answer you say "PING!? PONG!"
From: Troc
...You spend at least 30 minutes making sure everyone in the channel says goodbye to you.
From:mi6
. ...You are an op in #wasteland
From:angels@exit109.com
...while making love to someone from your irc channel, you moan out their nick instead of their real name :) ...
From: Spin
* You read the idea about a toilet seat in your desk chair and tried to do it.
* Your RL friends call you by your nick.
* Your parents call you by your nick.
* Your teachers call you by your nick
. * Your wife calls you by your nick.
* Strangers call you by your nick.
From:Door
. ...you stop speaking in full sentences
I am Saint skullY the Dazed fnord
If you've had the urge to copy and paste text from a magazine...
...and you wondered why it didn't work.
You setup the program "screen" on your providers unix box so you can be logged into IRC 24/7...
...and you rename the binary to "ircii" because your sysadmin kept killing any process calling itself screen.
You've ever written a web page for IRC.
You set your resolution to 1024x768 so you can have room for 3 or 4 telnet
windows (For IRC) and still be able to type
here without missing any /msgs.
You make sure every Unix box you have an account on has the newest version
of irc EPIC installed so you don't have to
modify your .ircrc.
You've ever started your own IRC network! (Hiya Runt and the other FEFnet admins! :=)
You wanted to think of more of these then everyone else who's posted theirs so far. (Who? Me? :=)
You tried to make your own bot, but didn't have enough patience so just stole the source for someone else's bot.
You remember when a channel of 50+ regulars had only 3 or 4 regulars.
You've ever registered a channel on the Undernet or Dalnet.
You've joined a help channel and ended up answering questions instead of asking the question you needed answered.
You joined a channel for a client you've never used just to keep ops for a
friend for a min, and ended up answering all
the questions that came up.
You have Deadelous' IRC Archive memorized.
You've caused a netsplit to get ops back in your favorite channel.
You've lost at least 5 O: lines because of abuse.
You have to be pryed from your computer with the Jaws-of-Life (R) & (TM) Fire Fighters of America.
From:Tresa
. ...your last sexual experience was really just a "textual" experience.
From:Desiree
... Your boyfriend's dumped you, and you still love him, and to get away from all the depression, you look at IRC....
From:death zone
. ...u use /action before u do anyting
From:?
. ...your son still calls your boyfriend who you met on irc, and who you are now living with, by his nick.
From: Tigui
. ... You started your own channel and wanted to see how long before your bot can change the topic or kick someone out.
From:OmegaWolf
. ...You have a second phone line put in so your wife can MUCK and quit bugging you about tying up the primary line.
From:Locke7
You might be addicted to irc if a T3 Line is suddenly a legitimate option
From:span breaker
..you are absolutely romantic ...
From: IRISHNYC
...If you see a member of the opposite sex and wish you can /msg him or her
...or if you see a jerk in a bar and your first reaction is to kick/ban
From:brazil@vs1.invsn.com
...tilt your head to smile.
From:brad
. ...youd rather do this than jerking-off
From: LifeSaver
... You actually subscribe to OperList!
From:RuTaLiA
...you miss a concert that you waited two months to see because you were on irc (this applies to all major events) or
..you set your kitchen on fire while cooking dinner because you wanted to "check
you mail" and while you were there you
just wanted to "see whose on"
From: Mr-Q
... You find Yourself reading this page...
From:Megalith
. ...You started doing a /whois on people who posted here
From:mAdMiKeD
...You find yourself taking off your shirt and clothes just to get the "feel" of CyberSex.
...You ask your parents for things they have NO idea about like Scripts and Bots and Popups
From:SnoCaT
...you realize that you are double clicking the remote control for your TV
From:mystey
...you bookmark this page so you can refer irc friends to it. ...
From:Kirby-krb
...you have a TTY phone and aren't deaf
...mirc is in your windows startup folder
From: FNoRDMAN
. ...you actually try to flood yourself just to quit
From:RainKing
You might be addicted to irc if...you go to a party in RL and yell out "OPS!".
Then you can't figure out why everyone
is looking at you funny. Then you realize there must have been a netsplit, so
no one has ops.
From:Aklan
... the mailman arrives late and you find yourself muttering, "Stupid server!"
From:Mindy/mckee
...you meet irc people out in public and you have no idea what their real name is, so you call them by their nickname.
From: Aurik
... You can't install an IRC client on your system, so you just use raw telnet, instead!
From:Araandel on #Teen-Dorm
. ... you have been banned from more than one EFNet server.
From:Snakefinger
...you run multiple clients of mIRC so you can fill your own room up.
From: Bi0S
. ...all your friends have greater and less-than symbols around their names when they talk.
From:mookie
...the only time you get something done is when there is a storm and you have
no choice but to disconnect (that is if
you have a circuit breaker but I don't trust nothing with my george)
..Oh yeah, and if your puter has a nick too.
..If you stop going over to yuor friends house cause they don't have irc.
..If you have a pager strictly so that people can get a hold of you at any given time.
..If your cat learns how to use the puter too (hey, cats are smart)
..If you have to have a new toy on your puter every day.
..If you don't remember what rl is
..If you never go outside anymore (either cause you can't, or ya don't want to)
..If you use the word yepper in rl.
..If your boss knows were you live cause he has been there so many different times.
..If you think your tv is just a unused monitor
. ..If any of! these apply to you.
From:heal
. ...your sex life suffers from netsplits.
From: Marq21
...you have lots of money to get on-line...
From:Linda AKA Lindie
. ...friends that you have had forever call you on the phone and you DON'T
tell them what is going on in your
life....cause you can't copy and paste it for them....and they wouldn't understand
any how....
From:
. ...your wife has to mess you to get you to talk to her!!!
From: VIPER
..You get married in #TheChapel ...
From:
...you need the time and your first instinct is to find a keyboard instead of a clock.
From:Wynonna
. ...you sleep still connected to IRC and the beeps (when your name is said) wake you up and you go talk.
From:Kentar
.. you've been off irc for a long time and you type in the air in your sleep ...
From: Gareth You keep logs on file for the memories ...
From: apebaby
...You try to ping your friends when they do not respond.
From:Ella
...You set your alarm to 3 am each morning 'cause that's when it's prime irc
time in the States (obviously i'm not from
the states :) )
From: Linet
... Ur making love every night with your cyber lover withour feeling *really* guilty.
From:
...The most important part in you're relationship is cybersex .
From:
...The most important part in you're relationship is cybersex ...
From:SuprMindy
...you get upset when someone else uses your nick.
From:GavinR
...Your wife says "Hey honey, wanna talk dirty"? and u answer "We only have one computer".
From: Kat on the EFNet's #beatles
. ... You have a cyberhusband/wife
From: TreBaby
...you drive across the country and back to meet your cyber-sweetie in RL
From:
.. ...you took the time to read every single one of these!
From: DeathDlr
...you feel lonely at night when your ISP is down.
From:
...you've ever typed :-)
From: Kwzy4Alto
. ...you've picked up the phone to dial your friend and enter his IP address by mistake.
From: Kwzy4Alto
...you've picked up the phone to dial your friend and enter his IP address by mistake.
...they awnser "cant remember, not enuff scoll lines"
... you are cutting and pasting this list to someone in a private msg
... you decide that 1 year is long enuff to waste your life on irc, and when
you finally write a resume you dcc it to
all your mates to c what =they think :)
...eMail: meridian@nectar.com.au IRC Nick: meridianHome Page: Buy Articles
Seldon
...even with all of the above "ifs", you can still think of another one. :P
From:
...you are still reading this.
From:TipN
..You are reading this list and can site examples when you have done the above
...You are still reading this list
...you stop to figure out what time it is across the country so you can talk to someone else in California.
(C) 1996 Darrell Meece. http://www.rotfl.com/irc-addict/.